Archive for May, 2009

Voting may not sound as important as a good sexual relationship and it does impact all of our lives.

May 18, 2009

I’m probably going to sound preachy here and I’m sorry about that. My intention is to impower you to take your power and use it for yourself. One of the ways to do that is to vote.

There is an election in California on May 19. It is costing the State, you and me, huge sums of money. It should be unnecessary and it was demanded by some legislators as a condition for supporting these measures. A low voter turnout is expected and that is not good. Voting is a very small price to pay for living in a democracy, and the results of which, if these propositions pass or fail, , will impact us all. I can’t urge you strongly enough to take the time to become familiar with these propositions and to vote. I’m making it very easy for you by posting here information and recommendations from several groups.

2009 MAY ELECTION BALLOT RECOMMENDATIONS

PROP 1A: Spending cap Limits amount of money government can spend each year. Will probably cause large budget deficits starting in 2011. Risks ability to restore current budget cuts and may force major cuts to schools and health care services in future budget years.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Federation of Teachers, CA Nurses Association, CREDO, League of Women Voters, SEIU CA
SUPPORTING: CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Assn Print this sheet and take it with you to the polls.

PROP 1B: Education funds Would provide a one-time payment of $9.3 billion to schools, spread out over several years beginning in 2011. Requires passage of Prop 1A to be funded.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Nurses Association, CREDO Mobile
SUPPORTING: CA Democratic Party, CA Federation of Teachers, CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Association, SEIU CA

PROP 1C: Lottery borrowing Allows governor to sell unlimited amount of bonds, and obligates the state to pay the bondholders with lottery funds or general fund if lottery sales fail to grow to pay back bonds, regardless of our budget situation. May not raise the expected $5 billion.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Federation of Teachers, CA Nurses Association, CREDO Mobile, League of Women Voters
SUPPORTING: CA Democratic Party, CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Association, SEIU

PROP 1D: Divert funds from First Five In 1998 California voters approved Proposition 10, creating the First Five program that helps children under age 5 get health care, education, and other vital services. This proposition would raid that funding and divert it to the general fund.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Federation of Teachers, CA Nurses Association, CREDO, League of Women Voters, SEIU CA
SUPPORTING: CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Association

PROP 1E: Divert funds from mental health In 2004 California voters approved Proposition 63, taxing incomes over $1 million to fund mental health services that otherwise had no funding. This proposition would raid that funding and divert it to the general fund.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Federation of Teachers, CA Nurses Association, CREDO Mobile, League of Women Voters, SEIU CA
SUPPORTING: CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Association

PROP 1F: Blame legislators Republican State Senator Abel Maldonado demanded this be placed on the ballot as his price for voting to approve the budget. It would prevent legislators from getting a pay raise in deficit years. This saves hardly any money and diverts attention from the real reasons our state budget is flawed.
OPPOSING: Calitics, CA Federation of Teachers, CA Nurses Association, CREDO Mobile
SUPPORTING: CA Democratic Party, CA League of Conservation Voters, CA Teachers Association

Thanks for reading this, and, remember to vote on May 19th. I’m very interested in your response to this and how you felt when you voted.

With warm regards,
Zora

P. S. If you want to see who these organizations are, please go to the following website:
http://www.couragecampaign.org/May2009voterguide

Advertisements

Did you know that what you feel outside the bedroom influences what you feel, and, more importantly, what you do inside the bedroom?

May 12, 2009

The following article taken from the BBC discusses the relationship between our emotional intelligence and our sexual responses. Our emotional intelligence is not the same thing as our mental intelligence. Emotions have to do with how we’re feeling and there are many more emotions than just mad, glad, bad or sad. Our feelings, whether we’re aware of them or not, are always a part of our behavior, and not just our sexual behavior. Therefore, it is very important to be aware of what we’re feeling so that we have more options and choices about what we do.

Emotional intelligence ‘aids sex’

Women who are more “emotionally intelligent” get greater pleasure from sex, research on twins suggests. A study of more than 2,000 female twins showed that those with greater emotional intelligence had larger numbers of orgasms.

These women were better able to monitor their own and others’ feelings and emotions, which is key, say the King’s College London investigators.
Their findings appear in The Journal of Sexual Medicine.

“ Most women, and men for that matter, will have this problem at some stage in their life ” Paula Hall, a sexual psychotherapist for Relate.
All of the 2,035 participants completed questionnaires giving details of their sexual behaviour and performance and also answered questions designed to test their emotional intelligence.

The research found a significant association between emotional intelligence and the frequency of orgasm during masturbation and intercourse.

Professor Tim Spector, director of the Twin Research Department at King’s College London and co-author of the study, said: “These findings show that emotional intelligence is an advantage in many aspects of your life including the bedroom.

“This study will help enormously in the development of behavioural and cognitive therapies to improve women’s sexual lives.”

In tune
Up to a third of women find it difficult or impossible to reach a climax during sex.

Lead author Andrea Burri said: “Emotional intelligence seems to have a direct impact on women’s sexual functioning by influencing her ability to communicate her sexual expectations and desires to her partner.”

She added that there was a possible connection with a woman’s ability to fantasise during sex or her feeling of control over the act.

Paula Hall, a sexual psychotherapist for Relate, said: “Emotional intelligence is most important in terms of overcoming problems.

“Most women, and men for that matter, will have this problem at some stage in their life. It’s often situational – you are tired or stressed or having relationship problems, for example.

“It’s not just about technique and the environment being right.

“If you are aware of your own emotions and can identify the issues and communicate them, you are more likely to be able to resolve the difficulty.”

Story from BBC NEWS:
Published: 2009/05/12 06:17:33 GMT

I hope that you might find this enlightening, and I look forward to any comments you might have.

Warmly,
Zora

What I Want for You

May 3, 2009

People continually ask me how I can do this work, listening to people’s traumas, issues and problems. The following note from a client who is a domestic violence survivor really touches me and answers that question. I have her permission to print it.

Dearest Zora:
Upon the advice of a friend, I came to you in January of this year [2008] broken, diminished, and in despair. Today, I feel stronger, more empowered and resilient than I’ve ever felt in my entire life. This is in large part, of course, due to your gift of therapy. Thank you for helping to put me back together again.  M.

I, of course, did not put M. back together. She did the work and I am deeply honored that she allowed me to accompany her on her healing journey, and to be able to provide the safe space for her to do so.

I would be equally honored to provide the safe space and to accompany you on your healing journey.

Warmly,
Zora